*I keep you in my heart*

It was 2:23 am when I decided to turn in. I lay there, bombarded with our memories. I can't help to cry again and again. I cried out every single aching in my heart. Resenting every mistake that I've made. I can't imagine that I ruined something so close to perfect for me, I ruined something we have built for a long time. We love each other so much, gave all we have to each other. Got ourselves broken at the end. I respect your decision. Maybe you are right that we should keep things this way? Maybe we should stay this way. Separated. It is so hard for me to agree with you. I was suffocating when you said that we shouldnt be together, because we are in a position so uncertain. You always look at the future not the present. You always do things in the right way. At least we wont hurt that bad in the future. All I can do now is to keep you in my heart and get on with my life. Everything I do I think of you, everywhere I go, most of the things reminds me of you. At least I have memories lingering in every corner. At least I have something of you.

I'll definitely miss you like nuts when you are in Jakarta for a month. I'll miss you so very much. You promise me that we'll hang out as much as we can before you leave. I hope you can spend my birthday with me and my family. That would be perfect for me.

I guess this would be the last time I would say this to you before I can say it again freely and happily. Once again:
*I heart you*