Do i deserve a post like this?

I dont think i deserve to be a committee... I really dont think so..
I am afraid I'll disappoint the people around me and mostly the people who are above me...
Its difficult.. I got no experience in RS... I am new towards this stuff... and now I am the leader?
Vic said there's no point complaining cuz I am already here..
I am already the leader and I cant change that...
Yeah, it might be true... But really.. I have no faith in myself...
People might have faith in me, but there's no point if i dnt have faith in myself...

Vic, do forgive me..
Do forgive me for being like this always...
being all emo and stuff..
But whenever the sky turns black, the rain starts falling....
Raindrops start touching the ground,
I can't control but to be like the weather,
gloomy, sad and down....
It cant be controlled I dont know why..
I start savoring the weather,
thoughts will rush into my head,
my heart starts to feel heavy,
my eyes starts to filled up with tears...
For no reason...
Maybe it's because of the hurt from the past...
That still lingers in my heart...
Make my heart bleed,
its still healing...
and Vic you are my medicine...
I love u very much...
I dont know bout the challenges we'll face in the future..
But we'll face it together,
it makes us tired,
but I hope it makes us love each other more,
makes us rely and need each other more...
I hope so...
I love u.